There are a lot of popular writings out there that I just don’t get. They don’t appeal to me. Angels and Demons, Twilight, The Lovely Bones…I’ve read [or at least skimmed a few chapters] of each, and found the writing incredibly mediocre or downright pretentious and just plain bad. Thankfully, these books have not [and if there is any justice in the world, never will] made it onto any school curriculum list. Required school reading was normally alright, as a kid. Most of the stories were very memorable, and presented in an eloquence that is, sadly, not seen often these days. But then there are some that got into the school curriculum that I still don’t see the appeal of. Like the Great Gatsby. I remember thinking all the female characters seemed incredibly dim, and it bugged me. Yet kids are still taking English exams on it [maybe I need to give it another read?].
Among writing about stupid women, the author of the Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald, apparently also did other wacky things…like making a very entertaining list of creative uses for turkey.
Turkey and Water: Take one turkey and one pan of water. Heat the latter to the boiling point and then put in the refrigerator. When it has jelled, drown the turkey in it. Eat. In preparing this recipe it is best to have a few ham sandwiches around in case things go wrong.
What a weirdo.